today was just freaking awesome. this was probably the best christmas in my life, but boxing day was even better.

Christmas first
on christmas eve, went with Emma for a catholic mass at church of the risen christ at toa payoh. it really opened up my eyes, first we went at 930 and had to queue up all the way till 12 midnight. didnt really know the timings but i think there was a mass at 9-1015, and another at 12-115. so we waited and chilled. at 12, midnight mass started. its very different cos they have preaching and we're supposed to respond, like say amen or like praise be to God. its quite ritual like and even when they speak about joy they are pretty solemn and serious. im not sure if thats the way God wants it to be but it was quite interesting overall. took a cab back home and slept at 2 plus.

Christmas day
went for 11am service, woke up at 10am and heard mummy was fetching me hahahah! yaye! so went for 11 service, arrived early and felt quite lonely without moo, sitting in the last row alone like a lonely moo until jess sms then went out to wait for her. it was a really good service all about mathew chapter 1 verse 1, the genealogy chapter, but i felt they shd sing more christmas songs. but again, praise songs are also about christ as much. i think i love christmas songs too much. was nice seeing jess and she agreed to meet again yaye!!

afternoon went home, slept awhile (did i not sure) then went out at 530 to sentosa. first time seeing resorts world, quite interesting and nice. ate at this ramenplay shop, its like a fast food centre total oppposite of marche. super commercialised, i felt like a product on a production chain. the stupid soft shell crab is 5.80 and its TINY. so lame la. anw moving on went upstairs, went to see this crane dance. took quite long for it to start finally at 915. went to this shop candylicious, wanted to buy cards but a small card is like $6. so nvm. bought a $3 cup of lemon ice blend drink, quite a ripoff but i was really thirsty. after that crane dance started but then it rained too! so everyone went indoors, quite wasted but the cranes are big and really expensive. also went thru this $25 mil radio sound system, quite cool. talked to korkor andrew about game mechanics, quite interesting. after that went home and slept heheheh. arranged meeting with jess tmr in morning! and benjy tat chern and julian in afternoon! was really happy and free day, with family and with God.

Boxing day
woke up at 915, then started going to meet jess at tanglin mall. kinda lost my way around, dont know wheres botanic gardens. finally met her then walked around botanic gardens. nice to see alot of kids and families there on a sunday morning. spent like 15mins walking around aimlessly before sitting down and eating her homemade food hahaha. jess if you're reading this, it was a really nice time spent talking with you about life and God, about your UK life and abit about my Army life. I dont know why but it just all feels so timeless and every moment so precious, talking with you suddenly made me appreciate everything and everyone around me so much more. and for the three things that you didnt want but came true for you, i believe God will make the best out of it anyway, i think he'll admire your choice to follow your parents so diligently despite your desires being otherwise. i dont know if God spoke to you thru your parents, maybe he did knowing your heart, (which will follow your parents' advice) maybe he didn't intend to do so. maybe he wants you to one day follow your desires, maybe he wants you to give them up so he can shape your life the way he wants. regardless, i admire you going overseas even tho we're home bunnies at heart ahahah. maybe when the time comes (like in just shortly over a year more!! so fast!!!) i'll be able to make a brave decision also. we'll see. Thanks Jess for the time spent today, it was soul filling in a way i've not experienced for a long time, (maybe cos i've known you for three years but never really had a really open up conversation with you) and so i thank you, and i thank God.

moving on, i went home at 2+, ate, napped at 330 and wanted to wake up at 4. then i woke up at 4, felt tired, slept again, woke up at 5 WHEN IM SUPPOSED TO MEET BENJY AND JULIAN AT 430!! haha so i just grabbed jess' note and rushed to mrt, reached marina square at 530. met benjy and julian and it was a really nice time as well, in a guy catching up sense. was good talking to benjy about ocs, commision and stuff, talk about his leave getting wasted( i felt so happy knowing TMR'S LEAVE FOR WHOLE WEEK YAYEEE!!) and then he left at 6. only half an hour with him but it was nice. overslept zzz. felt like needed more time to talk to him proper but thats okay. so after that just me and julian. it was nice, havent seen him in AGES, want to catch up for real. he's quit WoW so thats good for him, agrees with me that its a time sink. and we spent time talking about soccer teams, him enlisting soon and stuff. told him not to worry, everything will really past very very fast. as i am typing here today, tomorrow i might be celebrating a Christmas where i've ORD-ed. yaye!! hope we can watch arsenal v chelsea together soon as well. i kind of miss him from the old times since we both can relate to each other pretty well compared to the rest. he wants to LAN soon and that'd be nice as well. talked until 6 plus before i went home at 7.

while on the train back i just felt absolute joy in my heart, joy which just made be jump seriously. i jumped out of the lift and ran back home. its just so so nice talking to all three of them, each of them so special in their own way. for Jess, its just this timeless feel to the whole meeting, and God speaking to me about how much i should appreciate people and everything around me. for Benjy, it was short, but it was a good continuation about our growth as individuals in Christ, abit of gossip(secret) and that nice guy feel. for Julian, it was about not meeting for so long, and nice to know he's doing fine, giving him abit of advice and wanting to follow up after missing out on each other's lives for so long.

and so here i stand, by the grace of God who died on the Cross so i can live and breathe today, 11 months from ORD, with 5days leave staring at my face, a day before Linh comes home. All i can say is, i'm really really happy. We have cause to hope, truly. Thank you God, and good night. Amen.